Thursday, May 20, 2010


So...I my thoughts have been of planning a vacation.  A real vacation.  A vacation where DH and I go alone and we have some fun. 

..but I'm feeling a bit guilty for it.

For years all we've done is save our money.  We used our savings and got a failed IVF.  Now without much savings, we should be responsible, especially in this economy, and continue to save.  But I can't stop thinking of a vacation.  I'm ready to do something fun! 

Am I alone in any of you feel guilty for doing something for 'you' instead of everything you can to have a baby?

Monday, May 10, 2010

Mother's Day

I hate that there is a day to honor something I'm not and want to be so badly!  I had a headache all day because I was fighting back the tears all day.  I had a few melt downs and got really sad.  I just kept thinking that I should be enjoying this day.  I should be a month a way from my due date.  I should be anticipating my baby's arrival.  Instead I'm dreading this holiday AGAIN.  It was tough.   

I can't end this post on a negative note.  I had my loving husband next to me holding me while I cried and I know he'll continually be there for me.  We're in this together and that is comforting.

How did you survive Mother's Day?